BOO!!!! ( As in Scary)

I have three major fears in my life; all of which I think are extremely forgivable. I'm going to start with the one fear that is slowly leaving me and reducing the number of spaz attacks that I experience when I go to the doctor. Every time I have to get a needle, I cry like a baby. Actually, I cry more than a baby would when I am forced to have small doses of viruses injected in to my immune system via pointy metal. Don't get me wrong, I am not against vaccines ( although the movie I Am Legend scared the living crap out of me). I am against the indescribable anxiety that takes over my body ten minutes before I get a shot and twenty minutes after I get a shot. I am not kidding when I say that I cry before I get a shot, when I am receiving the shot, and about twenty minutes after I get a shot. When it ( I love being able to use the word it again) comes to needles, I have no control over the complete breakdown that occurs while I am sitting on the table. I'm almost positive that the three-year olds ( yes I still go to a pediatrician) in the waiting room hear me and laugh. I have recently discovered that a huge part of this shot spaz attack stems from my mom making fun of me for being afraid. She basically provokes the situation and and makes me cry for a longer amount of time. 

My second fear is flying. Although I have been on flights in the past, the thought of boarding an airplane literally makes me want to vomit ( gag).  The first time I flew on a plane, I was completely fine. This fear exists because of a dream that I had prior to the second time I was supposed to fly again. When I was in middle school, I went on a cruise with my family. A week before we were scheduled to fly to Florida, I had this horrible nightmare where the plane crashed and every passenger died. This was the worst dream that I ever had. I distinctly remember waking up in a panic. The dream was so terrifying that I was crying in my sleep. Needless to say, planes have scared the living crap out of me since that one morning. I have to admit that this fear has proven to be semi-embarrassing. I am almost certain that my friends wanted to flush me down the plane toilet on the way home form senior trip when the plane hit turbulence and I convinced myself that we were all going to plunge to our inherent doom.

The third and final fear that I have is the fear of not living up to my full potential. I am terrified of failure. A complete spaz attack encompasses me every time I do poorly on a test or score below "above average" on assignments. School stresses me out beyond belief;  and I feel as if I inch closer and closer to failure with each wrong multiple choice answer or merely "average " essay that I write. I feel as if my ultimate fear of not living up to my full potential will eventually disappear after I land my dream job. 

Almost Hyperventilating,

Samantha