Its a miracle! I can read!

Just because I serve food in order to pay my bills,  I am not stupid. Yes, I can read. Here is a conversation/scenario that took place between a server( me) and a customer.

Me: Can I start you off with anything to drink?

Customer: Do you have #$#$%#%%#? [I blurted out the name of the beer that he asked for in order to avoid copyright issues].

Me: No I'm sorry we don't carry that beer. [ I proceed to read every beer that we have on tap and in a bottle.

Customer (In a semi-snotty voice): Ugh. Okay, I'll just go with #$#%##[ different beer than before]. 

Me: Ill be right out with that.

I'm going to provide more information in order to give the world a better understanding of the situation, my horrible luck, and insight on bar glassware as well. Bars and restaurants, well the one I work at in particular, has glasses advertising beers and other liquor that we do not carry. I don't know why my restaurant does this; but I do know that the beer that the customer asked for, his second choice, came in a glass advertising the beer that he originally wanted. Yes, the beer that the restaurant seriously does not carry.  This would only happen to me. 

I proceed to bring the beer to the table.

Me: Can I start the table off with any appetisers?

Customer (noticing the glass): Come here, do you know what this glass says? Can you read this? This glass says #$##%$%@.  I just wanted to let you know.

Me (trying my hardest not to comment on their ugly shirt): I assure you that we do not have this beer. I will go double check with the bar if you want me to. 

Customer: No, I am fine with %$%$^, I just wanted to point that out.

My subconscious: OK yes, you caught me. I'm telling you we do not carry this beer because I hate you and want to make your life miserable. D#$% Head! 

 I swear I can read at college level, even though Green Eggs and Ham is still my favorite novel,

Samantha